Knickers in a twist

It’s always a pleasure watching Deep Blue Sea on ITV2 - if only for the moment, about twenty minutes from the end, where Saffron Burrows strips out of her rubber wet suit, ostensibly to use it as insulation, to reveal her perfectly toned body… clad only in the most pristine-as-the-driven-snow bikini/underwear you’ve ever seen! She’s been through ordeal after ordeal and yet the two-piece swimsuit looks brand new - not a blemish on it!! One of the three augmented sharks is dead. There are two left and one is headed straight for her as she tries to retrieve her research into a cure for Alzheimer’s. Saffron has managed to get out of the water by climbing onto a conveniently positioned table. She notices some cabling to a light and decides to rip it from the wall and shock the shark. Cue the Alien rip-off as the gorgeous girl undresses down to her undies in preparation for the battle with the big beastie! In a way I prefer this inferior version of the scenario, simply because I happen to think Miss Burrows is better looking, and sexier, than Sigourney Weaver. Maybe that’s because Saffron has softer features, being an English rose, compared to the harder facial characteristics of the American?

You may have seen Saffron Burrows in other productions. She first came to my attention when she appeared in Dennis Potter’s Karaoke, and adorned the front cover of the Radio Times, fifteen years ago. She’s also more than a little corrupting in the feature film Enigma, concerning the war effort deciphering codes at Bletchley Park alongside Kate Winslet’s more straight-laced character. In Deep Blue Sea, Saffron’s female co-star is Antipodean actress Jacqueline McKenzie. She’s a bit of a looker, too. But, by the time our heroine is warding off one of the nasty monsters in her panties, juicy Jackie has sadly already bitten the dust. Except it was the shark doing the biting! I first saw Miss McKenzie in a three-part BBC adaptation of Ben Elton’s science fiction novel Stark, which also co-starred the author himself doing a spot of straight acting. Staying in the genre, Jacqueline is probably best known now for playing the lead in The 4400, a series detailing the return to Earth of a large group of alien abductees… all on the same day.

I hate rap! As far as I’m concerned, it’s the most tedious and monotonously nauseating noise ever marketed to and inflicted upon a gullible, musically illiterate, general public. However, if you want to know how many eggs to break to make the perfect omelette then LL Cool J is your man - and, no, I don’t have a stutter! That’s the rapper-turned-actor’s moniker but you won’t hear his recipe by tuning into Saturday Kitchen! LL is, actually, quite likable as the chief cook and bottle washer in Deep Blue Sea. When not gawping at Miss Burrows, keep an eye on the chef’s verbose parrot, as well as Samuel L Jackson’s equally loquacious moneyman. I guess that’s what happens to pets and politicians who talk too much! If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll know what I’m talking about. If you haven’t, you’ve at least a couple of surprises in store! Despite Mister Cool J’s winning performance, I could’ve done without his closing theme song. Although, having said that, my head is like a shark’s fin when it comes to breaking the surface to take a peek at the sexy Saffy almost in the altogether. I only wish the camera had dwelt a little longer on her shapely form. Still, the lens certainly covers some interesting angles!

Santa banter!

I’d like to take the opportunity to wish readers of this journal a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous, or perhaps in the current economic climate that should read preposterous, New Year! Don’t worry, the ordeal will be over in a few days!! Then, we can stop kidding ourselves and get back to the real world. Why so many of us, sheepishly, centre our hopes and dreams around these few days when it might be just that little bit warmer during August, I’ll never understand. Still, the children seem to like it and that’s all that matters, right? As long as I don’t have to listen to that awesomely awful, utterly insincere, record by Mariah Carey (again), I should be able to keep my thoughts to myself.

What is there to distract each and every misery guts, like myself, on the big day?

There are at least five different versions of the Scrooge story on terrestrial television, on Christmas Day, to keep us company. If you’re up really early, you can catch “Dani’s House” at 7am on BBC2 in a seasonal repeat entitled “Scrooge Tube”. Harmer’s annoying younger screen-brother learns the true meaning of Christmas when visited by the ghosts of Christmas past.

“Scrooged” is on Channel 4 at 1pm if you prefer your comedy American. Bill Murray plays a TV executive planning a season of violence for the festive break. I still have my light blue “Get SCROOGED With BILL MURRAY” badge which I was given by a rep to promote the film back in 1988. In fact, I’m wearing it. You think I’m joshing?

Staying across the Atlantic, “The Grinch” is on ITV1 at 3.10pm. Dr Seuss’s cult children’s favourite “How the Grinch Stole Christmas!” gets the big-budget Hollywood treatment in this seasonal spectacular from director Ron Howard. More detailed reviews of these two films can be found on page 82 of the current Radio Times. Other listings magazines are available.

Quintessentially British, despite originally being (partly) devised by a Canadian, “Doctor Who” is back on our screens at the Unearthly hour of 6pm on BBC1. In “A Christmas Carol” the only way the Doctor can rescue Amy and Rory, trapped on a crashing space liner, is by saving the soul of a lonely old miser played by Michael Gambon. I don’t have the foggiest what’s in the fog!

Ending up back where we started, on BBC2, “Blackadder’s Christmas Carol” is at 8.35pm. Like “Scrooged”, this special was made in 1988 but flips the traditional Dickens’ story on its head. And, if you’re in need of something with a pretty “Doctor Who” companion, this extended episode briefly features Peri actress Nicola Bryant. What more could you want?

The Television Set

“Heartbeat” returns on Sunday evening for its final run of nine episodes to conclude its twenty-four part eighteenth series. Have no fear, this isn’t a post about to sing the praises of this easy-going show. Its demise has prompted Alison Graham, on page 51 of this week’s Radio Times, to claim that “the era of the long-running television drama is over”. In her conclusion she goes on to suggest that “maybe even “Doctor Who” should call it a day after another couple of series - there’s nothing like going out on a high”. I don’t actually think “Doctor Who” has reached anywhere near its full potential and could continue as long as there is the imagination and creativity to invent “new worlds and new civilisations”, to borrow a popular American slogan! Is Ms Graham suggesting that television drama, from here on, will become totally transient? I enjoy series with returning characters. It’s one of the reasons I prefer television to cinema.

What exactly constitutes long-running? I’ve often thought, in the back of my mind, if a series makes it to its seventh year then that show is a commercial success. Other folk may have different ideas. There are no hard and fast rules. American seasons have greater episode counts than their British counterparts. “Medium” is about to enter its seventh year of production, and seems to alternate between sixteen and twenty-two episode runs. It has reached the benchmark set by most of the series in the “Star Trek” franchise! Were “Doctor Who” to finish at the end of Matt Smith’s three-year run then Russell T Davies’s baby would achieve approximately the same. It would be a mistake for Alison Graham to assume that “Doctor Who” has been running since 1963. It was as good as off-air from the end of 1989 to early 2005. It was given a long rest and this new interpretation is but five years old. That’s not to say it won’t be rested again, when ratings eventually fall, only to be reincarnated again another day.

I’m not even sure I would’ve resurrected “Doctor Who” in the first place. It suggests a lack of new concepts and ideas where once there was an abundance. “Doctor Who” was a happy memory and RTD’s vision tainted it for me. I was forgiving when the original series presented weak stories where, now, I’m relentlessly unforgiving. Perhaps it’s because I’m older, more critical, cynical, and probably less accepting of writing that falls short. I’m a loyal personality, though, and will stand by the programme through hell and high water! I remember Alison Graham being a fan of “The Cops”, a short-lived, relentlessly grim, police drama. That appeals to one type of viewer while “Heartbeat” appeals to those who find pleasure in stories about something other than drugs and prostitution! Live and let live!! And, now that Nikki Sanderson has taken off Dawn Bellamy’s mini-skirt for the last time maybe the actress should consider joining the cast of “Doctor Who” before it’s too late!!!

Chris talks about Who exit

Actor Christopher Eccleston quit “Doctor Who” after one series because he “didn’t enjoy the environment and the culture” of the show.

Eccleston, who is about to star in BBC Four biopic “Lennon Naked”, took on the role of the Time Lord when Russell T Davies revamped “Doctor Who” in 2005.

He told the Radio Times he was proud of the show but “wasn’t comfortable” working on it.

“I think it’s more important to be your own man than be successful, so I left.” Rumours, at the time, suggested Chris had had a huge falling out with one of the directors!

Christopher Eccleston has also said he has no jealousy towards his former “Our Friends in the North” co-star Daniel Craig, who made it big as James Bond.

Eccleston said: “No, really there wasn’t. You wouldn’t cast me as Bond physically. The sexual charisma that Dan has was a huge part of it.

“And I’m a different animal. I saw him on those billboards and it was a great feeling.

“I was an obsessive Bond fan as a kid. I loved the Sean Connery Bond and Dan is just as good. Fantastic.”

Eccleston will next be seen on TV playing John Lennon, whom he called a showman, but a cripple inside. “Torchwood” and “Absolutely Fabulous” actress Naoko Mori, whom Chris has worked with previously on the “Doctor Who” episode “Aliens of London”, features as Yoko Ono.

Elsewhere, “Doctor Who” star Karen Gillan has hit back at the “uproar” over her character Amy Pond’s sexy clothing - saying feminism was not the issue any more.

Gillan said Amy did not conform to a simple “girl next door” formula - and her short skirts were typical of what young women like to wear (no contradiction there then, Karen).

The 22-year-old told the Radio Times Amy was a “strong female” who would not stand around in awe of the Doctor.

She said the relationship between Amy and the Doctor was one of equals - and she liked the fact that Amy was the one who sometimes drove the plot with her own storylines.

aRTy without the Drivel!

The beauty of a “Doctor Who” Radio Times cover is that you can admire the visual without having to listen to what passes for a script in this day and age, not unlike watching Girls Aloud or the Sugababes on television with the sound switched off!

The opening couple of minutes of “The Next Doctor”, seen twice on “Children in Need”, showed exactly where Russell’s mind is at, regarding a possible future incarnation of the lead character… and I’m talking about the Doctor, not his companion! The next Doctor’s few lines of dialogue were enough to present its audience with an identikit version of the current incumbent of the TARDIS.

I believed David Morrissey would make an interestingly swarthy Doctor, well before I knew he’d been cast in this year’s Christmas Special. When I saw him as Colonel Brandon in “Sense and Sensibility”, at the very beginning of the year, I thought there’s your man!

But, folks, like Mr. Morrissey’s immediate predecessor and his predecessor before him (that’s Chris Eccleston, if you’ve lost me!) Morrissey’s Doctor is incorrigibly rude and very up his own bottom!! RTD’s Doctors will always be characterised thus so it doesn’t really matter who the eleventh Doctor will be…

More pertinent a question is whether or not the style of writing will change radically under a new leadership, if indeed there really is a new man at the helm of “Doctor Who”. Russell, it seems, is holding onto the reigns of “The Sarah Jane Adventures” which also refuses to move forward following the introduction of… yawn… a new family. Pretty as Rani is, she has yet to make her mark!

I’m ever hopeful “The Next Doctor” will surprise me. I know David Morrissey is simply playing what’s written, and following orders like John Simm before him, but I’m praying the new arrival will still shine, despite!

Three reasons to look forward to the “Doctor Who” Christmas Special include David Morrissey, the return of the Cybermen (even despite their bastardisation, it’s about time a familiar foe was featured in a festive instalment), and the fact that part of the story was filmed in College Green in my hometown.

Telly Visions: Deborah Watling

I’ve decided to start up a brand new strand, on this blog, profiling some of my favourite actresses who have appeared on both the small and large screens over the decades. I’ll attempt to give it a personal slant in that each post will concentrate on the productions in which I’ve most enjoyed their performances. I make no apologies for the fact that this, hopefully, regular series of pieces is picture-inspired. I’m the one who has to look at this blog most often, therefore I will try and accompany each small article with a rarely seen image of each vision of loveliness! I suppose I could’ve called the series “Favourite Actresses” but thought it a dull and uninspired title. After a little more thought, I came up with “Telly Visions” instead! So, turn on, tune in and open up your eyes as first off the starting block is the gorgeous Deborah Watling!! But, then, they’re all beautiful…

Deborah is the daughter of actor Jack Watling. She first came to my attention, naturally enough, in “Doctor Who” during the late-Sixties. I’m beginning with her because she played the female companion throughout what is my favourite year of the science fiction series. Deborah joined the show, playing Victoria Waterfield, at the end of the Fourth Season, in the second episode of “The Evil of the Daleks”. Her father in the story is exterminated by the Daleks and so the second Doctor, Patrick Troughton, takes her under his wing, essentially adopting her by inviting her to join him and Jamie aboard the TARDIS. There is a rather touching scene in “The Tomb of the Cybermen”, the opening story of the following season, in which the Doctor tries to comfort and reassure her after her tragic loss. It isn’t dwelt on interminably and is the perfect example of how to deal with such issues in an essentially escapist series such as this. Her real dad joined the cast as Professor Travers, during her run, for the two Yeti stories and, in her final tale, it is her amplified scream that defeats the seaweed creature in my all-time favourite “Doctor Who” story, “Fury from the Deep”. It wasn’t only Jamie who was sorry to see her leave the programme at the end of this adventure!

Debbie had already appeared in a long running series at the tender age of eleven. She played Sally Brady in nine episodes of “H. G. Wells’ Invisible Man”, broadcast during 1959. Six years later, she appeared on the cover of the Radio Times to promote her starring role in Dennis Potter’s “Wednesday Play”, entitled “Alice”, which also featured future “Wexford” actor George Baker. Since moving on from “Doctor Who”, after a magnificent forty episodes over exactly eleven months, I suppose it’s fair to say television appearances have been thin on the ground. We saw a lot more of her as Sandra, alongside David Essex, in rock ‘n’ roll flick “That’ll Be the Day”. Whilst Ringo (Starr) is off doing his business elsewhere, our man from Essex attempts to get inside Miss Watling’s undergarments, lucky geezer, in one of the holiday camp chalets where he’s clearly gainfully employed! Back on the small screen, Deborah played Lorna in “Hello Young Lovers”, an episode of “Rising Damp”, in which her ample bosom is certainly thrust to the fore!! And, coming full circle, she appeared in the recurring role of “Naughty” Norma Baker, opposite Anthony Andrews, in seven episodes of “Danger UXB”, a series co-created by non other than Verity Lambert, the original Producer of Watling’s best-remembered gig, “Doctor Who”!

Keeping Who Covered

Having no sooner got back from the newsagents, after acquiring all six “Doctor Who” DVDs courtesy of The Sun giveaway, I now have to make a return visit, pronto, if I’m to pick up all four versions of this week’s Radio Times while stocks last! My favourite cover is the one on which the Ood looms large, not least because it also happens to be the one on which la Donna is least visible!! Miss Tate has her knockers, it’s true, but never let it be said that I am one of them! My impartiality is exposed for all to see!! Otherwise, why would I post four blooming great pictures of the lovely lofty lassie?!!

Guest stars are pictured in abundance including Phil Davis, recently seen as Wilfrid Brambell in “The Curse of Steptoe”, as Lucius together with Peter Capaldi as Caecillius whom I remember playing rocker Zeno Vedast in “Some Lie and Some Die”, one of my favourite Inspector Wexford “Ruth Rendell Mysteries”. Shame they didn’t see fit to include former “Howards’ Way” actress Tracey Childs as Metella in the picture, who also features in “The Hanky-Panky of Frankie”, as well as spell Capaldi’s character’s name correctly! Ladies exhibiting their wares include Sarah Hotpot as Miss Lager, from the opening episode “Pilchards in Brine”, and Velocity Mint Cake as Lady Edible with Vanilla Thermal Undies as “Marble Sponge Pudding” creator Marathon Christ Knows, both featuring in “The Horny Horse and the Hornet”.

The Ood cover features Tim McInnerny as Mr Halpen. Dunno what he likes for breakfast but he’s best known for playing the Chancellor of the Exchequer in “Blackadder Goes Forth”! Oh, hang on, I’ve got my facts slightly muddled… Tim was Captain Darling in the final series of “Blackadder”, not Alistair Darling!! I can only imagine the misunderstandings that might arise from such a problematical surname. Picture Prime Monster Gordon Brown addressing this formidable financial fellow, by said surname in the Gents, with the conversation being overheard by an undercover police officer… Anyway, don’t forget to tune into “Doctor Who” this Saturday evening, at 8.30pm on BBC Four, for what promises to be the start of an exciting adventure!

Ten Past Five

The new edition of the Radio Times, out today, has a terrific “Doctor Who” cover. The look on fifth Doctor Peter Davison’s face says it all! Mind you, so does the smirk on the face of David Tennant’s tenth Doctor!! Peter is obviously wondering what-the-hell his future incarnation has done to the console room of his TARDIS? David is grinning, confident in the knowledge that he is now the big boss man! It’s a good picture but it does suggest that the “Children in Need” Special, “Time Crash”, is going to be played for laughs. I guess you can’t have an angst-ridden story when its purpose is to raise money for those less fortunate than ourselves. The new episode, written by Steven Moffat, airs on Friday 16th November, exactly a week before the 44th anniversary of the show on the 23rd. It’s interesting to note that the last time two Doctors collided, sixth Doctor Colin Baker with second Doctor Patrick Troughton, was also the last time the Time Lord faced the Sontarans, due to return next year. I wonder if Peter will be bringing any of his former companions with him? I’d love to see Peri again…

Doll Parts

Inspired by Steve’s recent post “Hamble is Evil”, I was reminded of a “lovely” photo of ex-“Blue Peter” and “Crufts” presenter Peter Purves, taken for the 1973 “Radio Times Doctor Who Tenth Anniversary Special”, in which he’s surrounded by a selection of rather inert-looking toy soldiers, rebellious robots and killer dolls.

Referencing one of the “Doctor Who” stories in which he’d appeared, in his acting days during the Sixties (“The Celestial Toymaker”), I’m thinking Peter wouldn’t have looked out of place as one of the “Monty Python” team! In this picture, he’s the “Spitting Image” of a certain Eric Idle!! “Know what I mean, know what I mean?” I’ll “say no more”!!!

RTD on SJA in RT

It was the likes of 70s’ children’s dramas “Children of the Stones” (supernatural goings-on in an English village) and “The Tomorrow People” (ordinary teenagers developing superpowers) that inspired a young Russell T. Davies to become a television scriptwriter. “I loved the sort of dramas that were set in this world, but had an otherworldliness to them,” he says. “They had all this possibility that there were fantastic forces at work beneath the ordinariness of the world. How marvellous!”

When he became a writer, working on ITV’s groundbreaking “Children’s Ward” and creating “Dark Season” (a proto-“Buffy the Vampire Slayer” children’s drama) for the BBC in the 90s, Davies’s fascination with children’s TV continued. “From my time on “Children’s Ward”, I learnt an enormous amount from [its creators] Paul Abbott and Kay Mellor. It dealt with tough issues such as rape and anorexia, but it also did stories for younger viewers exquisitely.”

Despite his success on such shows, Davies knew that his heart wasn’t in children’s drama. “It wasn’t my natural audience. The committed practitioners of children’s TV are passionate about talking to six-year-olds – like Anne Wood who created “In the Night Garden”. But I wasn’t. I was slipping jokes about Emily Brontë into “Breakfast Serials” – a programme I used to do on Saturday mornings – and I realised then I was writing for hung-over students and it was time for me to depart.”

But now, after hits such as “Queer as Folk” (1999), “Bob and Rose” (2001) plus, of course, the reinvention of “Doctor Who”, Davies has returned to CBBC as executive producer of the ten-part “Who” spin-off “The Sarah Jane Adventures”.

The series, which follows a successful pilot at New Year, features former companion Elisabeth Sladen as Sarah Jane, her adopted teen son Luke, neighbour Maria and their new friend Clyde. But 21st-century kids’ TV is a vastly different landscape from the one Davies left. “I fancied the challenge of writing something for children based on “Doctor Who” at the same time as CBBC were keen on something. There was talk of the adventures of the young Doctor on Gallifrey, but I said absolutely not. When we brought back Sarah for [2006 “Who” episode] “School Reunion”, she worked wonderfully and the idea blossomed from there. I think it’s important to make children’s drama as strong as any other sort, but it’s changed a lot. Now, children’s TV is for kids between six and twelve, so the more adult stuff has migrated to the likes of “Hollyoaks”. With “The Sarah Jane Adventures”, I had to be aware of the audience being young. You have to monitor yourself not to be paternalistic or not to write in a strand of romance, but to keep it aimed squarely at that audience.”

With the presence of aliens with sinister plans, does “strong” equal “scary”? “I wouldn’t want children to be left in a state of dread. Fear is fine, but I do have a problem with terror.”

So what of the state of children’s TV today? Does he feel, as author Philip Pullman does, that a lot of it is “social poison” with children treated as marketing opportunities? “It’s a profound mistake just to look at the toy on the shelf and ignore the programme, which has got to be good in the first place for kids to watch.

“And just because something’s American and there are 22 episodes, people assume it’s rubbish. “That’s So Raven”, for example, is a decent little sitcom and very well acted. And the main character isn’t stick-thin, so that’s magnificent, too. “High School Musical” could have been so much cleverer, but with the likes of Disney investing so much money in children’s TV, I do feel optimistic about its future.”

Interview by Gareth McLean © Radio Times (page 31)
Cover from Doctor Who Online

Manhattan Transfer

I had a mental wish list of what I wanted to see from “Daleks in Manhattan” and I’m pleased to say the “Doctor Who” team successfully accomplished everything for which I’d hoped. Actually, I’m more than pleased, ecstatic would be closer the mark! Firstly, I didn’t want the appearance of the Daleks held back to the episode’s end. Despite tradition, I didn’t see the point in doing that considering the title. They took a hold of the story just ten minutes in, appearing from an art deco lift of the period, flanked, Ogron-like, by a couple of Pig Men! Sounds bonkers but it worked. Each of the three seasons of new “Doctor Who” has included a two-part Dalek story and, previously, I felt the first episode, in both cases, was a wasted opportunity. “Bad Wolf”, in the first season, squandered its running time on game show nonsense while “Army of Ghosts”, a year later, tried to convince me that said ghosts weren’t Cybermen! And, I guessed the Daleks were waiting to be released from the sphere at the episode’s end. Both these examples felt like forty-five minutes of padding leading to a moment of revelation from which the story could start. Not so on this occasion.

Then there was Miranda Raison. I fell in love with Jo Portman, her character in “Spooks”, from the very first and didn’t want to see her prematurely exterminated in new “Doctor Who”, like so many quality actors before her. Again, I’m happy to report that Tallulah, Miranda’s character in “Daleks in Manhattan”, has survived to fight another day in next week’s concluding episode, “Evolution of the Daleks”. She’s currently languishing underground, lost in the sewers of the city, after a wonderfully touching moment when she is reunited with her boyfriend, Laszlo, who has suffered at the protuberances of the Daleks. If I hadn’t known it was Ms Raison, from the cast list, I don’t think I would’ve recognised her! She looked and sounded so completely different from her tough no-nonsense character of the MI5 series. Having sung her praises for the past couple of years, her performance lived up to expectation showing an altogether different persona to the one to which we’ve become accustomed. I love the scene where, knowing the danger, she has the guts and plucks up the courage to join the Doctor in his search, allowing me to imagine her as companion for one brief moment! Even if she meets a fate worse than death, before story’s end, she’ll have played her part.

And, finally an episode in which Rose isn’t mentioned. She’s been name-checked in every episode since her departure and it was beginning to wear thin. There was no silliness worth speaking of in “Daleks in Manhattan”. Even the obligatory gay reference made me laugh and wasn’t as in-your-face as usual. The Doctor told Martha she could kiss him later and Frank too if he wanted! There was a big grin on actor Andrew Garfield’s face at the suggestion! None of the cast let the side down. Hugh Quarshie was marvellous as Solomon especially at the moment of breaking bread. A terrific message for the audience, adults as well as children, to share especially in times of adversity. I knew Black Dalek Sec would end the episode inhabiting the body of Mr. Diagoras as the tie the hybrid’s wearing on the cover of the “Radio Times” gives the game away! It wasn’t just the visual aspect of the monster the magazine revealed but it didn’t spoil my enjoyment of the story. The sequence was handled masterfully. It’s the best Dalek story since the show returned, helmed by the same director as last season’s best story, “The Impossible Planet”. James Strong lives up to his surname!

Radio Times Duo

Highlights from Radio Times:

3.1: SMITH AND JONES

"Martha is 23, a medical student, and her family's going into meltdown. Dad's run off with his secretary, Mum's boiling with fury, brother Leo's got a six-month old baby, and sister Tish is all ambition, thinking only of her next job. Martha's stuck in the middle, as the peacemaker. Just the sort of woman who needs an escape. Before you know it, mysterious storms are sweeping across London, sinister motorcycle couriers are stalking the hospital and Martha finds herself transported to the Moon! That's just the beginning of her troubles, as the alien Judoon arrive in a fleet of mighty spaceships — big, brutal space police! Only one man seems to know what's going on: a patient called John Smith. And he claims he's some sort of Doctor."

3.2: THE SHAKESPEARE CODE

"We've taken Martha back to 1599, when Shakespeare's at the height of his powers, in London's Globe Theatre. But if you're ten years old and the word 'Shakespeare' makes you groan, then rest assured, this isn't just a history lesson. There are witch-like creatures at work, strange deaths — a man drowns on dry land! — some terrible puns and a fearful plot dating back to the dawn of the universe. ... I think this might be our most lavish production yet. We try to film in and around Cardiff, but there aren't many Elizabethan settings around here, so the team had to travel to Warwick, Coventry and to the Globe itself for some magnificent location filming."

3.3: GRIDLOCK

"The Tardis returns to the year five billion, on the planet New Earth, where the Doctor and Rose last fought off cat-nurse nuns and zombie patients. ... But before long, greedy Pharmacists, hapless kidnappers and terrifying Beasts from Below have thrown Martha into danger. And all because the Doctor told a lie.... The Doctor's old friend, the Face of Boe, is waiting with a secret."

3.4: DALEKS IN MANHATTAN
3.5: EVOLUTION OF THE DALEKS

"1930s New York, Pig Men, sewers, showgirls and the Empire State Building. Oh yes, and Daleks, too. ... Helen's done a brilliant job, combining the Depression with the Daleks' desperation to survive and adding a good bit of The Island of Dr Moreau. Not to mention Frankenstein! Be prepared to see the Daleks as you've never seen them before."

3.6: THE LAZARUS EXPERIMENT

"A good old mad scientist, with an experiment going wrong, and an outrageous supervillain on the loose. ... The episode also marks a return to modern-day Earth and a chance to find out what's been happening to Martha's family in her absence. ... This time, pay attention to the enigmatic paymaster of Professor Lazarus as a trap plotted across the whole of time and space begins to close . . ."

3.7: 42

"The 42nd century, a spaceship in a far-flung galaxy, saboteurs at work, crew members possessed, and the terrifying catchphrase 'Burn with me'. To be honest, I love that title as I can't wait to see the Radio Times billing for this episode: (7/13. 42). Dial that number, you get a free pizza."

3.8: HUMAN NATURE
3.9: THE FAMILY OF BLOOD

"A very different sort of story — though still with monsters and scares galore! But when you've got David Tennant as your lead actor (call me biased, but The Best Actor in the Land, frankly), then you want to write stories that push the Doctor into completely new territory. And these two episodes take the Time Lord to places he's never been before, all in the haunting setting of a boys' public school in 1913; the winter before the War, with a chill in the air, and mysterious lights in the sky. If ever you thought scarecrows were scary, you ain't seen nothing yet."

3.10: BLINK

"The King of Terror, that's Mr Moffat. ... Doctor Who rarely scares me, because I've seen all the behind-the-scenes prosthetics and computer trickery, and I've lived with the scripts for months. But when I watch this episode — I'm not kidding — I'm scared to death! Go on, I dare you. Close the curtains. Turn the lights off. Huddle round the TV. Clutch your loved ones. And shiver."

3.11: UTOPIA

"Jack's back! As John Barrowman's Captain Jack Harkness comes storming back on board the Tardis — with an arrival like no companion has ever had before — it's time for the Tardis's wildest ride yet! It hurtles out of control, taking the crew to the distant planet Malcassairo, where a lonely and patient professor is giving his all to save his people from extinction."

3.12: THE SOUND OF DRUMS
3.13: LAST OF THE TIME LORDS

"The trap closes, as the Doctor, Martha and Captain Jack find themselves in a desperate fight for survival. Who are the Toclafane? What is the power of Archangel? And what terrible secrets are stored at the heart of the Valiant? It's an epic and heartbreaking story, as the Doctor faces his greatest enemy yet. Now, I wonder who that could be . . ?"