Song of the Siren

Readers with a relatively-long memory may recall, some three years ago, a two-part Telly Visions feature on model-turned-actress Lily Cole. It never crossed my mind, at the time, that one day she might pop up in “Doctor Who”, although unlikelier things have happened, but now here she is, guest-starring as villainess the Siren, in this week’s episode “The Curse of the Black Spot”. A bit of a naff title really… Considering an ex-Marks and Spencer supermodel is at the centre of the story, its designation sounds like a commercial for Clearasil or some other skin cleanser! In mythology, the Siren was a sea nymph, half-woman half-bird, who was believed to sing beguilingly to passing sailors in order to lure them to their doom on the rocks on which she sat. Would it therefore be too presumptuous to suggest that the title of this post might equally suit Saturday’s adventure? Actually, none of the titles this year, so far, have been up to much. And they’ve been extremely derivative. It’s only five years since “The Impossible Planet”, yet this year’s series opened with “The Impossible Astronaut”. “Doctor Who” fan-and-chronicler David Howe suggests on his blog that “Silence Falls” would’ve been a superior title and I agree. “Day of the Moon”, for a title, is just plain dull and perhaps influenced by “Day of the Daleks”. By the same token, “The Curse of the Black Spot” may have been inspired by “The Curse of Peladon” or “The Curse of Fenric”. The fourth episode is “The Doctor’s Wife” when we’ve not long dispensed with “The Doctor’s Daughter”. In a few years time, I’m looking forward to watching “The Doctor’s Concubine”! It’s not all bad news on the titles front, however. Episode six, “The Almost People”, sounds intriguing given the current political climate!

Lily Cole began her professional acting career in “St. Trinian’s”. I think it a little ironic that when David Tennant left “Doctor Who”, one of the first jobs he accepted was the “St. Trinian’s” sequel, “The Legend of Fritton’s Gold”. It might be considered a retrograde move especially now Lily has done the same jobs the other way round. Or maybe it’s a little snobbish to claim “Doctor Who” superior to the adventures of those riotous schoolgirls. On the other hand, “Pride and Prejudice” and “The King’s Speech” actor Colin Firth appeared in both “St. Trinian’s” films yet won awards for neither! So perhaps I’m not far out in my presumptions. The film Lily made after “St. Trinian’s” better indicates her suitability for a role in “Doctor Who”. “The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus” saw her teaming up with former “Monty Python” animator-turned-director Terry Gilliam. She played the role of Valentina in the film, scripted by the director with his regular writing partner Charles McKeown. As well as Christopher Plummer and Tom Waits, the film was to have co-starred Heath Ledger. Originally scheduled for a 2009 release, production was postponed after Ledger’s untimely death. Plummer played Parnassus, an immortal 1,000-year-old leader of a travelling theatre troupe that offers audience members a chance to go beyond reality through a magical mirror in his possession. Waits played the Devil, with whom the Doctor has done a deal. Cole played the Doctor’s daughter! (Another one!!) She falls foul of the Devil, when time comes to collect on the arrangement, and the troupe, which is joined by a mysterious outsider named Tony (originally Ledger), embark on a journey through parallel worlds to rescue the girl. Ledger’s role was recast with Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell portraying physically changed transformations of Ledger’s character as he travels through different dimensions.

Learning Curves

Supermodel Lily Cole has made her debut on the cover of French Playboy. The Marks and Spencer model has her hair in pigtails and is wearing only white socks for the cover shoot. She is seen clutching a giant teddy bear to her breasts, strategically positioned between her legs, and is pictured above the tagline Sweet Sixties Lily Cole. Flame-haired Cole, 20, has posed for a 14-page spread inside the men’s magazine. The shoot is said to have been inspired by the cover of French musician Serge Gainsbourg’s 1971 album “Histoire de Melody Nelson”.

Even before the pictures were published, some Christian groups immediately condemned the Playboy images as degrading without actually having seen them! They have called on customers to boycott M&S, saying the store is indirectly supporting Hugh Hefner’s notorious publication by continuing to employ Cole. But a spokesman for M&S said, “It’s entirely her own choice as to what other work she accepts and we would not wish to interfere with her career.”

“St. Trinian’s” star Lily deferred her place at Cambridge University. She won a place at King’s College two years ago to study social and political sciences but took two gap years off to concentrate on her modelling career. She has now switched to the three-year history of art degree. Miss Cole is also rumoured to be dating actor Jude Law, 35, after they were spotted together in public on several occasions during the summer. And there was me, 49, thinking I was in with a chance!

Flower Power

There I was quietly sitting there, minding my own business, when suddenly my ears pricked up on hearing the strains of David Bowie’s “Let’s Dance” emanating from the television set. Immediately, I looked up. I’m not one for watching commercials. Can’t stand the things if I’m honest. Someone once told me the ads are better than the programmes but I remain unconvinced. Perhaps they are, I just don’t watch the poorer shows the better advertisements, periodically, interrupt. On this occasion, however, it was worth my while. I was greeted with the telly vision that is catwalk model-turned-actress Lily Cole. She really is a stunner. I must have a thing for fiery redheads because the other lady for whom I have a burning passion is, of course, t.A.T.u.’s Lena Katina. These two gorgeous-looking young women top and tail the three hundred-picture twenty-minute slideshow you can view at the foot of this blog. If I had my very own TARDIS, I know which two ladies I’d want to be my companions and their names aren’t Billie Piper or Catherine Tate! Although, even they would be preferable to Fiona Phillips and Kate Garraway!! But, why I particularly dislike those two GMTV “presenters” - journalists my arse - is the subject for another day…

The advert in question turns out to be the latest trendy promotion for the Marks and Spencer chain and, in particular, their fashion line. Set on a fairground, other attractions, besides our Lily, include sold-out classical musician-turned-pop-star-turned-television-presenter Myleene Klass and Sixties’ fashion icon Twiggy. Black model Noémie Lenoir sports two sets of natty-looking undies, not at the same time you understand! These include polka dot panties, which she wiggles in close up, and a rather fetching set of pink bra and knickers to match the candy floss on which she is nibbling. I was going to say munching but being a slim model that’s probably unlikely! I expect you can tell, I was paying especially close attention to detail!! It’s all very fast, very slick, very stylish, and unburdened with product detail - different to those commercials insistent on telling you the price of everything where you end up remembering absolutely nothing. “Fashion Fairground” simply promotes a brand. If you’d like to watch it, without sitting through numerous commercial breaks hoping for an appearance from the lovely Lily, simply click on the link on the right to my “Jukebox”! “Put on your red shoes and dance the blues”!! Watching her figure, I can tell you that, at the start, sadly, and I know it’s a missed opportunity, Lily doesn’t actually lick her lolly!!!

Telly Visions: Talulah Riley

I’ve mentioned her before, in passing, but it was over two-and-a-quarter years ago… I even posted her picture to accompany the piece… So, it was good to see Talulah Riley back on our screens last night, in the “Doctor Who” episode “Silence in the Library”, although, sadly, her time in the story was short-lived. You can bet your bottom dollar that if I fancy someone, they’re the first character to be killed off! It happened a couple of years ago with MyAnna Buring, in “The Impossible Planet”, much to my annoyance!! I saw it coming this time, though, as I hadn’t seen Talulah in any of the prepublicity stills accompanying the hype surrounding Steven Moffat’s excellent latest adventure. She wasn’t featured in any of the trailers, either, so I was beginning to think her appearance was nothing more than a myth. In fact, I did notice the actress afterwards, in the accompanying “Doctor Who Confidential” documentary “Shadow Play”, having her photo taken, in costume, in a group shot with the rest of the astronauts. Hopefully, this picture will be made available shortly! There’s an old showbiz adage says “always leave them wanting more” and I suppose this was the case with tasty Talulah! The bizarrely named Miss Evangelista, her character, was reduced to a talking skeleton two thirds into the episode!! Sounds even more grotesque than her name but, believe me, in the context of the narrative, it worked.

Talulah is probably best known for her performance, alongside Donald Sutherland and Brenda Blethyn, as Mary Bennet in the recent movie version of “Pride & Prejudice”. I first came across Miss Riley, though, in an episode of “Agatha Christie’s Marple”, entitled “The Moving Finger”, in which she played the hopelessly lovelorn Megan Hunter to perfection. She certainly made me sit up and take notice, at any rate! Most recently, Talulah (spelling her name with two Ls and an H!) has been seen back on the big screen as sweet schoolgirl Annabelle Fritton, in the remake of “St. Trinian’s”, numbering Gemma Arterton, Lily Cole and Girls Aloud amongst her classmates. Yeah, I know, I seem obsessed with that film of late! But, Talulah does look good in uniform, though I can’t say for sure if she was wearing fishnet stockings and suspenders under her white astronaut costume in “Doctor Who”!! I’d like to think so! I was slightly surprised she’d accepted such a small role considering her steadily increasing credentials. It probably boils down to accepting the parts on offer, plus there is the added prestige of including the show on her CV. Lizo Mzimba, Entertainment Correspondent for BBC News and former long-serving presenter, reporter and assistant producer of CBBC’s “Newsround”, was also complimentary of the twenty-two-year-old’s stint on the episode saying, “Talulah Riley is fantastic as the not too bright Miss Evangelista - she’d make a wonderful and very different companion to the Doctor.” Naturally, I’ve posted some screen caps, on my Jukebox blog, over which you are all invited to ogle!

Lily of the Valley

Miss Cole didn’t look like this in “St. Trinian’s”! She’s naughty in nightwear and dazzlingly demure donning unkempt school uniform, though not necessarily at the same time, but, here, looks like a heroine from a bloodcurdling Hammer Horror movie…

The lovely Lily appears as though she’s being pursued through the long and winding corridors of a great castle, somewhere in the Carpathian mountains, by a certain Count… with only a candle to guide her way.

Soft white breasts partially exposed from the plunging neckline of a deadly black ball gown, long flaming curly-red hair cascading wildly about her person, she must move quickly if she is to escape the clutches of the arch vampire.

For generations, Dracula has been looking for the perfect companion. Through all eternity, for a beauty to eclipse all others. And, now, at last he has found her… wined, dined and confined her inside the impossibly high walls of his sprawling estate.

But, the Count must make her his own. Lily must become an immortal, one of the undead… Nosferatu… be able to stride across the surface of the Earth, at his side, not just on this cold and chilly night but into infinity. She has feasted at his table and now he needs, desires, lusts, to feed on her, taste of her, drink from her… to join together, forever, in unholy matrimony.

Telly Visions: Lily Cole - Part Two

Since completing her role in “St. Trinian’s”, model-turned-actress Lily Cole has turned her attention to two other film projects. Work was actually begun on the first of these some fourteen months before landing the part of Polly in the schoolgirl crime caper. Shock-rocker Marilyn Manson, an American visually influenced by the various stage personas of David Bowie, planned to star Cole in his upcoming movie “Phantasmagoria: The Visions of Lewis Carroll” as Alice. Shorts from the movie have been posted on Marilyn’s website and a feature-length film is, supposedly, in pre-production. From the point of view of “Telly Visions”, it would be interesting to see Lily as Alice in that my first choice of actress in this blog series, Deborah Watling, also began her career playing the same character. I wonder how different is Manson’s vision of the subject to that of Dennis Potter’s?!!

The second project, involving Lily, sees her teaming up with former “Monty Python” animator-turned-director Terry Gilliam. She was signed to play the role of Valentina in “The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus” scripted by the director with his regular writing partner Charles McKeown. As well as Christopher Plummer and Tom Waits, the film was to have co-starred Heath Ledger. Originally scheduled for a 2009 release, production was postponed after Ledger’s untimely death. Plummer plays Parnassus, an immortal 1,000-year-old leader of a travelling theatre troupe that offers audience members a chance to go beyond reality through a magical mirror in his possession. Waits plays the Devil, with whom the Doctor has done a deal. Cole plays the Doctor’s daughter! (Another one!!) She falls foul of the Devil, when time comes to collect on the arrangement, and the troupe, which is joined by a mysterious outsider named Tony (originally Ledger), embark on a journey through parallel worlds to rescue the girl. Ledger’s role has been recast with Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell portraying physically changed transformations of Ledger’s character as he travels through different dimensions. Very interesting. It sounds not unlike “Doctor Who”, with an added touch of Peter J. Hammond’s recent “Torchwood” episode “From Out of the Rain”!

I hope Terry Gilliam’s film sees completion. Lily has suggested she finally wants to take up her place to read Social and Political Sciences at King’s College, Cambridge, to which she has already twice deferred entry. Education is important and, being an intelligent girl as well as a beautiful one, it would be wise for her not to miss out on such a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. It would be nice if she could fulfil both and no doubt this creates a dilemma for her. However, she seems to have already made the decision to put both her modelling and film careers on hold in pursuit of academic excellence. I must say, I don’t blame her. With the news that the go-ahead has just been given for a further instalment of “St. Trinian’s”, it would also be good to see her returning to the part of geeky-but-pretty Polly. I look forward to seeing how it all turns out for Lily.

Telly Visions: Lily Cole

I’ll be perfectly honest and tell you I could look at pictures of this girl all day - with or without her clothes on! She’s simply stunning. The supermodel type doesn’t usually appeal to me but Lily Cole is different. She has that pixie/elfin quality about her face that I, and many others, find so charming in Kate Bush. The shocking-red hair is, also, definitely an asset. And, Lily’s perfectly-shaped boobs aren’t exactly going to put anyone off either! She’s been modelling for about five years. The story goes that, when she was fourteen, she was walking through the streets of Soho, after a hamburger with friends, when a talent scout approached her. Fearing she was being chased by “some dodgy guy”, Cole ran. But, after being asked to consider modelling, she accepted and was signed on with Storm Models, the mother agency of supermodels such as Kate Moss. Lily is now one of the models in the Marks and Spencer-clothing advertising campaign, becoming the youngest model ever to participate in a promotion for the line. The Sunday Times stated, last year, that she’s already worth £6 million… and she only turned twenty yesterday!

Lily has started to break out of the modelling world and move into acting. She played Polly in last year’s successful remake of “St. Trinian’s”, alongside Rupert Everett, Colin Firth and new Bond girl Gemma Arterton. St. Trinian’s, for those of you who don’t know, is a school for what are generally termed “young ladies”! With its anarchic doctrine of free expression, this wonderful establishment of learning brings together a motley crew of ungovernable girls - posh totty, chavs, emos, geeks and first years - who, using their wit and ingenuity, save the institution from bankruptcy. Sounds like the ideal place for Kerry Katona! The bespectacled Polly is in the geek clique, though doesn’t Lily look lovely with glasses. However, don’t take my word for it… I’ve posted a selection of ten screen caps, on my Jukebox blog, in order for you to make up your own minds concerning the leggy lassie. Lily appeared in the “Comic Relief” video of “Walk This Way” with Girls Aloud and, conversely, the girl group appear as schoolgirls in the film! If the thought of all those stocking-and-suspender clad legs is getting too much, “St. Trinian’s” is now available to own on DVD!!!