Dreamy Lady

The Second Season of “The Tudors” concluded recently on BBC Two and was promptly released on DVD on Monday, as was a set containing both last year’s run together with this latest offering. The total of twenty episodes reached a grisly culmination with the heartless execution of Henry VIII’s second wife Anne Boleyn. I think this was a shame! And, for all her stoicism, I expect she probably thought the same!!

Why do you think Anne’s death was a shame, Tim, I hear you all cry? Well, it means actress Natalie Dormer won’t be in the next series! History should’ve been rewritten in order to accommodate a lady with such gorgeous eyes. Some may think them narrow but that is part of her beauty. She positively smoulders.

Even when in danger of losing it, the girl kept her head! The doomed royal had Hans Matheson hear her last confession… that she hadn’t actually done anything wrong!!

Ironically, Hans, as the dastardly and corrupting Alec d’Urberville, in “Tess of the d’Urbervilles”, had donned preacher’s robes over on BBC One, whereupon one of our heroine’s milkmaid chums comments that he doesn’t look much like a man of the cloth…

Obviously, the producers of “The Tudors” thought otherwise. But, Hans could do nothing to save the lovely Natalie, despite the repeated postponement of her wanton slaying due to the late arrival of the axe man. And, I’m not talking guitar heroes here!

Tess’s Lament by Thomas Hardy

I

I would that folk forgot me quite,
Forgot me quite!
I would that I could shrink from sight,
And no more see the sun.
Would it were time to say farewell,
To claim my nook, to need my knell,
Time for them all to stand and tell
Of my day’s work as done.

II

Ah! dairy where I lived so long,
I lived so long;
Where I would rise up staunch and strong,
And lie down hopefully.
’Twas there within the chimney-seat
He watched me to the clock’s slow beat -
Loved me, and learnt to call me sweet,
And whispered words to me.

III

And now he’s gone; and now he’s gone; . . .
And now he’s gone!
The flowers we potted perhaps are thrown
To rot upon the farm.
And where we had our supper-fire
May now grow nettle, dock, and briar,
And all the place be mould and mire
So cozy once and warm.

IV

And it was I who did it all,
Who did it all;
’Twas I who made the blow to fall
On him who thought no guile.
Well, it is finished - past, and he
Has left me to my misery,
And I must take my Cross on me
For wronging him awhile.

V

How gay we looked that day we wed,
That day we wed!
“May joy be with ye!” they all said
A-standing by the durn.
I wonder what they say o’us now,
And if they know my lot; and how
She feels who milks my favourite cow,
And takes my place at churn!

VI

It wears me out to think of it,
To think of it;
I cannot bear my fate as writ,
I’d have my life unbe;
Would turn my memory to a blot,
Make every relic of me rot,
My doings be as they were not,
And gone all trace of me!

A Gem of a Role

She may be glamorous, whatever that is, but I’m not sure Bond girl Gemma Arterton has the right kind of face to star in BBC1’s new version of “Tess of the d’Urbervilles”. She looks too modern, too much of our time. I suppose it’s hard to dispel the memory of Nastassja Kinski, in Roman Polanski’s definitive 1979 account, simply renamed “Tess”, so good was the German actress in the part.

Pictured sporting off-shoulder red, as head girl Kelly, promoting the recent remake of “St. Trinian’s”, and about to be ogled as Agent Fields in new Bond movie “Quantum of Solace”, Gemma has been signed to play the lead role in the latest production based on Thomas Hardy’s finest novel. The story of the put upon dairy farmhand was last turned into a television drama, by LWT, in 1998. Although adapted by Ted Whitehead, and starring Justine Waddell, it wasn’t particularly successful!

Filming of “Tess of the d’Urbervilles” begins in the West Country later this month and the four-hour adaptation by David Nicholls will be broadcast in the autumn. Anna Massey, no stranger to Hardy territory, having appeared in Dennis Potter’s Seventies’ adaptation of “The Mayor of Casterbridge” alongside Alan Bates, also features. I must admit to being on tenterhooks as Tess is my favourite heroine in English Literature!